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Running from what you need most.

Human nature is a strange thing.  Our nature often works contrary to our personal good.  This is most obvious when it comes to how most Christians respond in times of duress.  I have observed that more often than not, when a person goes through a very trying time, the most common reaction to the life stress is to stop coming to church.  I have often wondered why this is so. 

Perhaps people think that it's inappropriate to bring their problems with them to church.  After all, church is supposed to be our positive social time right?  Actually, I believe church is supposed to be MUCH more than some positive social time.  Jesus clearly said that it's the sick who need a doctor, not the healthy. (Mt 9:12)  What Jesus was communicating was that He is all about ministering to those who don't "have it all together".  Yet for some odd reason, people who go to church seem to feel that Sundays are meant for those who "have it all together" to come and have a good time.  So what we see more often than not are people who feel sidelined during times of great stress because they don't feel like they should bring their problems to church.  Sadly, this often leads to a complete and long-term disconnect from church.

Considering Jesus' words, perhaps it's time to re-think church a bit.  For those of you who haven't been in church for a while because your life seems to be spinning out of control, I'd say this:  Don't cut yourself off from the place and people that can help you most in your time of trouble.  It's ok to bring your problems, your stress, your attitude or whatever to church.  Church should be a place to find peace...to get a break as you are going through the storms of life.  It should be a sanctuary, not merely a social club.  The church should be a place for you to find healing, not expectation to be "ok" all the time.  The church should be a place to have your extended family rally around you and encourage you when you don't "have it all together".  When you cut yourself off from church, you end up cutting yourself off from God's family whom God can use in times like these to encourage you.  This is one of the primary advantages to being a part of the body of Christ.  

So if you are feeling isolated and like your problems will never come to an end...try coming back to church where you can and will feel loved, encouraged, and supported.  It just may help lift you out of the hole you find yourself in.  Short explanation...We need each other, don't cut yourself off from those you need most.

Posted on Fri, 05/28/2010 - 1:28pm by Tom Ouweleen

Comments

Agreed

Fri, 05/28/2010 - 4:15pm by Tom Ouweleen

I agree with all the comments so far.  I would really like to see people get a little better at reaching out when they see someone who doesn't seem ok. 

But if you're one of those people and you've missed church for a few weeks and no one has called you, please try to understand that it's not that you're unimportant.  You are very important.  But there is simply no way for the pastor to keep up with everyone and to know from week to week who's there and who's not.  So often, people disappear for a while and get really angry because they haven't gotten a call from someone.  Keeping up with an entire congregation is a near impossible task.  We have tried countless measures to make sure people get called when they disappear, but nothing is fool proof.

And please don't ever think the pastor doesn't have time for you.  Try to realize that the pastor is pulled in a million different directions every single Sunday.  Most Sundays, there will be someone who wants my immediate attention after church and I get stuck in a conversation I can't seem to get out of.  Meanwhile, others want my attention and I wish I could give it to them.  This is why it's so important to realize that there are more than just the pastor who cares about you.  The pastor is only one man and there are many others in the body who wish to encourage you as well.  I guess it does take a village...

dissappearing.....

Tue, 08/17/2010 - 1:53pm by Dave B.

     Now, anyone that knows me, I tend to disappear sometimes for different reasons. I have been hospitialized in the past and Pastor Tom called wondering where I was . That was cool... Usally when a big scary tattooed guy disappears they sometimes breath a sigh of relief.( Whew!)  But the people here at Urban are genuinely concerned for their peoples welfare. I have a habit of introverting when things get a little skittish sometimes.  But either Bud,Tom or Steve try too rescue me from myself. And thats never happend anywhere else too me before. I have friends that I knew before comming too Urban, and one day God just brings them across my path in the front foyuer of this cool little church I found. So too the administration at Urban (all of you) Im so glad too have you guys on my side... Thank you from the bottom of my tattooed heart.

Running

Fri, 05/28/2010 - 3:57pm by Lenka

Very important blog.  It is also just as important for those of us in Church to notice if something is not quite okay with someone.  I think we all could learn to take ourselves out of our own shoes while in Church, observing and interacting with others in a way that might allow us to notice someone in need, as opposed to participating in lots of socializing exclusively.  I think it only takes one person to show up in pain, or lost, and if they walk out without even one person noticing, they feel invisible in the one place they thought God wanted them to go.  I think as we all continue to grow, we need to learn to ask "how are you", with all sincerity, and be ready to listen, and prepared to offer a kind word or hand - cuz I'm sure that is how God wanted to help that person - thru us, on Sunday, in Church.

I know right!

Fri, 05/28/2010 - 1:51pm by Melanie Wylomanski

Do you think that when times are hard the Devil tries to keep you depressed and full of self doubt?  In some of my darkest times it seems easier to just stay home and not share.  You start to think that the pastor may not have time for you and your problems.  Or you may not want to "bother" him. 

But when you get to church and the message speaks to you and you share with someone and then they pray with you/for you, the storm breaks and you can see hope and peace.  Sometimes it's just getting there.  Sometimes we need the encouragement. 

Church is important and the relationships we build there can also be exactly what we need.  Someone to help us in our times of need and someone we can help in there times of need.  Also, they can help us to remain grounded and keep us accountable.